KEY INFORMATION AND FACTS

DEAR PLEBS

THE BENBO GLOBAL MEGASTORE EXISTS TO SUPPLY YOUR DEMANDS FOR HIGH QUALITY BENBO MERCHANDISE.

CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU - FOR DESPITE YOUR LOW SELF ESTEEM AND NET WORTH, YOU HAVE STUMBLED UPON A SOURCE OF HIGH QUALITY GARMENTS AND ACCESSORIES THAT MAY CONFER UPON YOU THE CULTURAL AND/OR SOCIAL STATUS YOU CRAVE.

CAREFULLY EXPLORE THE WORLD OF OPPORTUNITY THAT EXISTS WITHIN THIS HIGH QUALITY MERCHANDISE UNIVERSE. TEMPORARY HAPPINESS MAY BE ACHIEVED SIMPLY BY COMMITTING TO PURCHASE ONE OR MORE OF THE PRODUCT LINES HEREIN (IT IS RECOMMENDED TO PURCHASE MORE THAN ONE IN ORDER TO MAXIMISE HAPPINESS POTENTIAL).*

WE THANK YOU FOR YOUR GENEROUS CONTRIBUTION TO THE MAINTENANCE OF THE BENBO FAMILY HOUSE AND GROUNDS.

YOURS SINCERELY
BENBO

*NB MAY ALSO LEAD TO TEMPORARY OR PERMANENT FEELINGS OF DREAD OR FINANCIAL DESPAIR